Boy #1’s sister called me when she got off work and said, “Where you been?” I said, “Work, school, blog, and work. Where you been? I called you the other day.” She said, “Work!” I said, “Yeah, I figured that. Because Lord knows you don’t go anywhere.” She said, “Whatever happened to the State Trooper guy?” I said, “We been out a few times and when I say out I mean planted in front of his living room television, channel surfing since the last time I spoke with you.” She said, “You don’t sound excited about it.” I said, “It’s not exciting.” She said, “Then why you hanging out with him?” I said, “Because he’s not a bad guy…it’s just…I don’t know.” She said, “Oh, you want Mr. Congeniality! You’re 25 now and you’re still somewhat on the scene, but trust me when you get my age what you want in a man will change. You’re going to want his butt to stay home.” I said, “Hell, I want him to stay home now. Just not all the damn time! I’m not trying to be like an old married couple sitting on the porch every day.” She said, “We can solve this problem. Just date a white man.” I laughed and said, “How is that solving the problem?” She said, “I don’t know. It seems like it would solve it though.”

Continue reading “The Comparison Report” »

I went to lunch with my co-worker one Tuesday afternoon. After a few minutes of small talk she said, “What ever happened with Officer Cutie?” I said, “I’m not interested.” My co-worker said, “Already?” I said, “He’s boring.” She said, “What do you mean boring?” I said, “I need excitement. I want to laugh. I don’t want to hang out with somebody that makes me think of everything else that I could be doing while I’m in their company.” My co-worker said, “What you need a person that will do magic tricks when you’re around?” I laughed and said, “Nooo.”

Continue reading “Is He Boring or Do I Like Drama?” »