Honesty is the Best Policy

The server had just dropped off the check for me and friend’s meal. We got ready to look at the bill when a brown skin, athletically built guy with bandages wrapped around his knees passed our booth. My friend looked and said, “Nah, that’s a set up.” I laughed and said, “What you mean by that?” She said, “With those bandages on people automatically would think he’s a current professional player. How much you want to bet he is retired, but he’s going to put on a show like that injury is current and it’s really from 1997.” I laughed.

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Groupie Love

Lauren and I decided it had been way too long since an outing. So we decided to go out downtown with her husband and brother. Lauren and I were posted on the bar watching the packed club dance to the music. She said, “You ready for All-Star Weekend?” I said, “Eh.” She said, “What’s that supposed to mean?” I said, “I’m excited because it’s All-Star Weekend, but with that being said it’s All-Star Weekend. I went online to purchase tickets to a party the minimum amount was $150. The crazy part was I went to that venue they are having that party at for like $20 last week. I don’t blame the city for capitalizing on the weekend, but dang imagine the prices and the traffic of that weekend.” She said, “I feel you. I was thinking about just walking around downtown, you know how busy it’s going to be.” I said, “Just chilling downtown is cool if I lived downtown, but the thought of the traffic to get into the downtown area is already making me hyper ventilate.”

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The Good Man vs The Baller

Instead of watching Sunday football at my house I decided to go to the Ale House to catch a couple quarters of the game. Basketball is my favorite sport to watch, but after seeing all the people crowded around the TVs and high fiving each other after their team made a good play I remembered why I liked football season.

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The Ex-NFLer

My older brother called me to see how my week had been going. I told him about what happened to me earlier at The Cheesecake Factory. He said, “Why you don’t want to go to the bowling alley?” I said, “I don’t know. I just don’t feel like it.” He said, “Ebony, you’re crazy! All you’re doing at home is watching reruns of some television show and snacking on junk food.” I said, “Nooo! I was looking at myself in the mirror with my new bra I just bought from Victoria’s Secret.” My older brother said, “Annd?” I said, “Watching reruns of Sex and the City on E! and eating packets of Gushers.” My brother said, “Just go.” I laughed and said, “I do have some cute jean shorts and a brown see-through shirt that would probably look great with bowling shoes. I’ll call you back later this week because The Assistant said they would be at the bowling at 7:30 and it’s 7:30 now, so I need to get ready.”

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Shacking Up

Lauren and I walked into Roxys and immediately we were glad we came out. She grabbed my arm and said, “Oh I didn’t tell you Maria broke up with her boyfriend.” I said, “Really?” Maria was a mutual friend Lauren and I had in college. Maria is an African American version of Kim Kardashian. From Maria’s body to her personality to her really wanting to be married reminded me of Kim K.  After a few failed relationships with current professional athletes Maria finally decided to give this guy named Jackson a try.

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The Bull

I walked out the back of a party downtown anxious to get home. I thought, “I didn’t even know the alley existed. How do I get to the parking garage?” An African American man said, “You lost ‘Slim’?” I said, “Hell yeah, I don’t even know where I’m at?” He said, “You parked under the bridge?” I said, “Yeah, right across from the Amway Arena.” He said, “I’m The Bull by the way.” I said, “I’m Ebony.” The Bull said, “You wearing that dress and that’s my team’s color too.” I ignored his comment because I knew he was expecting me to say, “What team?”

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The Text Message

My mom and I were talking about insecurities early Super Bowl Sunday. I told her how people can continuously tell a person they are pretty, but it doesn’t matter if they don’t see that in the mirror. I was one of those kids that had super low self-esteem. I think as a kid all you want to do is blend in. You want to dress the same, look the same, and have your hair the same as your peers.

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Home Court Advantage

 

When I told Angie about my date with The College Basketball Star she said, “Did you not learn anything from undergrad?” In true Angie form she gave me advice in her monotone voice telling me I shouldn’t go, but she already knew I was going to do what I wanted to do.

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The College Basketball Star

I detest going to work at 7am. Since I wait to the very last minute to get ready in the morning, I usually have to finish getting ready for work at work. This particular morning not only did I not put on makeup but I forgot all my jewelry. So, I went into Burger King for breakfast, fresh faced and accessories-less.

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The Track Star

What happened with The Track Star probably served me right. Since I was a kid I never took the easy route. I always had to make my life way more complicated than it needed to be. Maybe that’s why I spent half my middle and high school days on punishment. My mom would tell me I’m on punishment for two weeks and about time I got finished with all my slick comments and attitude, my two weeks would turn into a month or two.

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